Brazil & Benske, LLC

Milwaukee Family Law Blog

Ending your marriage as a newlywed

While planning a marriage and in the days after the ceremony, many couples envision spending the rest of their lives with each other. However, various things can go wrong, and some marriages do not work out. In fact, some people decide to split up as newlyweds, and you should not feel trapped in a marriage just because your family spent a lot of money on the wedding or you feel like you have to stick it out even though you know that the marriage will not work out. For example, some people may see a different side of their spouse once married, whether a couple is simply incompatible or domestic violence is involved.

As a recently-married couple, there may be a number of pressures, from those which are financial in nature (relocating, finding a new job, paying for the wedding, etc.) to other stressors (dealing with in-laws, adjusting to life with a spouse, and so on). Sometimes, these pressures can be so great that they cause a couple to drift apart. Many people have split up with their spouse even though they were recently married, so you should not feel stuck.

Is legal separation a better option for you than divorce?

Sometimes, a legal separation can serve as a cooling down period if there has been a great deal of conflict in a marriage. However, there are several other reasons a legal separation may be a better option than divorce for you and your spouse.

Following your religion

Discipline mistakes to avoid after divorce

Disciplining kids can be difficult enough under ideal circumstances. It can be even tougher for Milwaukee parents who are divorced, especially when navigating issues regarding custody and visitation. The following are a few of the common mistakes divorced parents make when it comes to discipline and how you can best avoid them.

Pretending your child’s misbehavior is acceptable

Divorce and the approach of the holiday season

For many families, the holidays are a time when everyone comes together, and people catch up with loved ones. The holidays can also bring up various stressful issues, and this is especially true for a couple that is in the middle of a divorce. Some people who have already broken up with their spouse may still attend a holiday celebration together, for various reasons, while others may avoid relatives during the holiday season because of their divorce. Some people who are in the early stages of working through a divorce are unsure whether or not they should visit their in-laws during the holidays.

There are a lot of things to take into consideration with respect to family parties and the holidays. For example, you may want to prepare yourself for some of the questions that could arise and how you will respond to a family member asking about your divorce. Depending on the details of your own situation, you may even decide to skip out on a get-together this year and focus on your own affairs. On the other hand, the holiday season can help people connect with their family members and find the support they need during a tough divorce.

What should I know about prenuptial agreements?

While no one wants to imagine getting divorced before they’re even married, the sad fact is that many couples who are now madly in love will end up divorced sometime in the future. If you personally own a large amount of property and assets, this could mean losing things that are rightfully yours if you don't have a solid prenuptial agreement in place. Forbes explains how prenups work so you can determine whether this option is right for you.

Prenups establish property rights  

What happens to home equity when you divorce?

Divorcing your husband or wife is generally a highly emotional process, and there are a number of important matters you will need to address along the way. Chances are, your shared home is one of, if not the, most valuable asset you and your spouse co-own. Therefore, one such matter you will need to devote attention to is what you plan to do with the house following your split.

When it comes to dividing home equity during divorce, you typically have three options at your disposal.

Exploring alternative processes of divorce

Ending a marriage in Wisconsin has traditionally involved a couple fighting out their issues in court. Divorce litigation has often led to exorbitantly high court fees and hard feelings on both sides. If you are seeking a divorce from your spouse but want to avoid the high financial and emotional costs involved, you should know that there are other, less contentious, options available. We at Brazil & Benske have observed that alternative processes such as collaborative divorce and mediation can be less costly, create less conflict and yield greater satisfaction than divorce litigation. 

According to FindLaw, collaborative divorce is a fairly recent development, dating back only as far as the early 1990s. In a collaborative divorce, negotiations take place in a neutral setting where the spouses meet with their attorneys. The expectation is that all participants, spouses and attorneys alike, participate in a discussion that is open and positive with the goal of reaching an agreeable resolution. 

Custody and false allegations

Unfortunately, divorce can bring out the worst in people and this is especially true with child custody cases. It is not difficult to understand why parents can become so emotional. After all, they may worry about their child's well-being or fear that they will not be able to spend very much time with their kids. Sadly, some people try to throw their child's other parent under the bus in order to gain an edge during a custody dispute. For example, they may falsely accuse their former spouse of domestic violence, an offense that is sexual in nature, drug violations, drunk driving or any other number of offenses.

If you have been falsely accused of an offense that could have an impact on your custody case, it is vital to know which options you have and handle the false accusations appropriately. Your ability to visit your child or win a custody case could be adversely affected by these allegations and you may face other consequences as well, such as a damaged reputation. We get that it can be hard to deal with these allegations, especially if you are already overwhelmed by your divorce or a heated custody dispute. However, protecting your reputation and securing your child's best interests is paramount.

Growing apart and deciding to divorce

A couple may split up for all sorts of reasons. Some people are never able to get over their spouse’s infidelity, while other people file for a divorce due to domestic violence, such as physical or verbal abuse. Some people may even move on from a marriage because they have found a new partner. Moreover, some marriages come to an end because a couple has simply grown apart. This can happen to many couples and it is not uncommon for people to change dramatically during the course of a marriage.

After being married for five, ten or twenty years, a couple may lose their compatibility and no longer enjoy spending time with each other. People can change during these long periods of time, in different ways, and these changes can make their spouse lose interest in the marriage. People can grow apart because of their differences, unfavorable changes (such as developing an alcohol or drug problem) or falling out of love.

The 3 most important professionals you need during your divorce

Ending your marriage is a difficult process that impacts your life legally, emotionally and financially. To figure out property division, child custody and support payments, it is best to enlist the help of various professionals. This will help you make the right decisions and deal with the stress of divorce.

However, finding the right people to help you can be stressful. Here is a guide for the top three types of professionals you should seek and what qualities you should look for in each one: 

  • Alist WISN 12 | wisn.com
  • Leading Lawyer
  • Super Lawyer
  • Nation's Premier NAFLA Top 10 Ranking 2014
  • American Inns of Court
  • ASLA 2015 top 100 Lawyer
  • 10 Best 2015 Client Satisfaction | 10 Best Lawfirms | American Institute Of Family Law Attorneys | TM
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